Thursday, March 7, 2013

Tough Ones for Dear Abby


Dear Abby, A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could be Lebanese?

Dear Abby, What can I do about all the Sex, Nudity, Fowl Language and Violence On My VCR?

Dear Abby, I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not even sure the baby I'm carrying is his.

Dear Abby, I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.

Dear Abby, I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around, and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again.

Dear Abby, Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?

Dear Abby, I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now how do I get out?

Dear Abby, My forty year old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50.00 an hour every week for two and a half years. He must be crazy.

Dear Abby, I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.

Dear Abby, My mother is mean and short tempered I think she is going through mental pause.

Dear Abby, You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?

Remember these people can vote...

Monday, March 4, 2013

Louisiana Story

VINTON, La. -- Police were surprized when a driver wearing only a towel got out of a car, then got back in and sped off. They were stunned when the car hit a tree and disgorged 20 naked people.

"The Lord told them to get rid of their belongings and go to Louisiana. So they did, plus the license plate off their car and came to our gorgeous state," Vinton Police Chief Dennis Drouillard said.
All 20 were from Floydada, Texas, about 550 miles from the southwest Louisiana town of Vinton.
Driver Sammy Rodriguez and his brother, Danny, both said they were Pentecostal preachers, Drouillard said.
Floydada Police Chief James Hale said he had been looking for the Rodriguez family since Tuesday night, when relatives reported them missing.
The family left six cars, abandoning one in Lubbock and a second in San Angelo and a third in Galveston, along with clothes, pocketbooks, wallets and other belongings.
The chase in Vinton began after a campground owner called police. A Calcasieu Parish deputy stopped their car, and a man wearing only a towel got out.
"When the officer went to ask what was going on, he jumped back in and took off," Drouillard said.
They sped down Vinton's main street until the car hit a tree. Fifteen adults, as old as age 63, piled out of the 1990 Pontiac. Five children, as young as 1 year old, were in the trunk.
The car was totaled, but the injuries all were minor, Drouillard said. "I guess when you're packed in that tight, there's not much room to move around."
Rodriguez was booked with reckless driving, flight from an officer, property damage and several minor traffic violations, he said. He was kept in custody.
Authorities said the entire group was released into the custody of a Baptist church nearby, where they awaited relatives.